September 22, 2007 by cosmoakacitizensmith
A completely irrelevant picture of me and and alien, aka Ally. Not sure who the geezer is, though…..
Those barmy army dudes at the Salisbury hotel in Ferndale sent a big shout out to anyone who’d ever played there asking them if they wanted to play at a festival in France next summer. They are organising the transport but there are limited places so they are getting people to compose a letter explaining their reasons for wanting to go. Here is my effort.
Please could you fix it for me to go and play at the Lorient festival with the Industrial Harbour crew.
This is why.
Here in the UK, particularly when compared to France, we have been sadly lacking in both the culinary and vino department for…well, ever really!
Indeed, when it comes to that side of things, we really are an international laughing stock.
However, thanks to global warming, we will finally be able to produce wine that will compete favorably with our French brothers and sisters.
If I am allowed to come to the Lorient Festival, I intend to sing songs of the virtues of Chateau Barry Island, Beaujoulais Pontypridd and Chateau Neuf de Burnham-on-Crouch!!
Therefore, in the interests of international wine making competitiveness, I would urge Jim’ll to fix it for me to make yet another prize plonker of myself on prize plonk from either (or better still BOTH) sides of the Channel, sing my tunes to our Celtic and Frankic brethren – (and throw in some French anarcho classics by Georges Brassens n all!).
If you do so, I promise I will never wet my bed under the combined influence of Ribena and Jack Daniels again.
Compo, all-conquering Vice Guru of Outer Malaria x